It Is Really A Food Addiction

So, my friend Deb came over last Saturday.  I showed her the no oil hummus, the salad dressing and the vegetable soup.  As well, I had her try my new love--the Mary's Gone Crackers no oil vegan crackers.  She loved them too.  I also had her try purple and orange cauliflower and yellow carrots.  She even tried the veggie crumbles.  I really didn't give her a choice on trying it.  If you don't try it, how do you know you don't like it??  So she tried everything and I hope came away with some idea of my idea of eating vegan.

I say my idea because I really do eat a lot of raw which really isn't for everyone.  It just helps me stay on track.  I read the blog I want a Dumpster Baby and she wrote a great blog this evening called That Drowning Feeling.  She writes about being a recovering alcoholic and how every now and then she really wants a drink until she remembers where it gets her.  Even though my issue is not alcohol, this one really hit home tonight. I feel exactly the same way about food.  I am such a binge person.  It is all or nothing.  Just like Katy can never just have one drink, I can never just have one Oreo.  I have to eat the entire bag in one sitting--I can't control it. Not just Oreos but ice cream, cake and cheese sauce too (not cheese sauce on Oreos, ice cream and cake though!) It led me to a lot of extra weight that contributed to my heart attack.  There are times now that I want an Oreo--especially since it was just the 100th birthday of the Oreo.  Pre-heart attack I might well have eaten 100 Oreos to help celebrate--food is my addiction.  Rather than land me in jail or a halfway house, my addiction lands me in the hospital on death's door. It is all or nothing with sugary food and salty food.  This is why I keep the vegan simple.  If I make it too hard for me, I set myself up for failure.  This is about my health for the rest of my life and I can't afford to fail.

I found a new blog called Heart Sisters.  It is some really good information.  She, like me, is in the 20% of women who survive the Widow Maker.  You should check it out!

In this health journey, I have found that I am very impatient.  Now that I made the decision to get healthy, I really can't wait to be thin again.  Having been both thin and fat, thin is much better for me.  Plus it is heart healthy.  I can truly say it is a lot of work and if I hadn't had the heart attack, I wouldn't be on my way to thinner....I would be eating 100 Oreo cookies.